Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Week 1: The People Stumble Out of the Gate

by Renal Failure


42-point day for Matt Ryan? What? 

Your People's Champion Renal Failure lost their opening game against the HBFFL newbies The Patriots 124-101, the biggest blowout in the HBFFL this week which shows how close games were in this opening weekend).  The Patriots scored the most points in Week 1 out of any HBFFL team (even with starting suspended kicker Matt Prater), mainly due to Matt Ryan have the best game of his frickin' life, so we can't be too salty about this loss.
Matt Ryan - 42 point bear in orbit

But we can be salty about Tom Brady only bothering to play one half of football (14pts - come on, man, Jeremy Maclin got 17 and he only really did anything in the 2nd half vs. the Jags), and Jason Witten not bothering to do anything (1pt). Demaryius Thomas seemed like the only person not catching anything from Peyton Manning on Sunday night (4pts).  We had Jay Cutler (26pts) and Zac Ertz (13pts)on the Renal bench, and if we had started them we would have pulled out a win but it's a brave or crazy man who benches Tom Brady, the man who invented throwing bears into outer space.

We got Ultra Beast Mode numbers from Marshawn Lynch (29pts), along with help from CJ Spiller's 12 and Alfred Morris's 9.  Yahoo! says we had the highest scoring tandem of RB's in the HBFFL, but we were also 9th in overall scoring in the league so... meh. Still Yahoo! was nice enough to give us a B for our losing efforts, as if to say "It's okay, we know you tried your best, here's some ice cream."
"The point is... never try."

Patriots got way more out of DeMarco Murray and Vernon Davis than we thought. Serviceable days from Randall Cobb and Giovani Bernard kept the pace, along with the Carolina Defense.  The only big disappointment was Eddie Lacy with 4 points. We'll see the Patriots again in Week Nine, where we vow to make them witness an HBFFL truth: Renal Failure is a beast in revenge games.

Week 1 is always a crap shoot, where you figure out what's working and what's not.  And even then, what worked can always fall apart and what didn't work can finally start working later in the season.  The point is, no one hits the panic button after Week One.  Except for that one year when Canucklehead lost Tom Brady in the first possession of Week One.  CRISIS!!!




Shit gets mean in Fantasy Football... 

So going into Week 2 against another new team, The Mile High Club (0-1), we're confident things will turn around for us.  Historically speaking, once Renal Failure gets on a roll, it's damn hard to stop us.  We've turned seasons around before.  And though Mile High is coming at us with the RB's we had last year (McCoy and Foster), we like our three-headed RB monster of Lynch, Morris, and Spiller just a bit more (though Yahoo! disagrees, giving Mile High a projected 100-99 edge).  But Mile High's rolling with Tony Romo, and we're not losing to a team starting Tony Romo.

Renal Failure is the People's Champion of Fantasy Football. Yeah, we lost this week in the HBFFL, but we had a big win in the FTWL where we had the highest scoring WR's in the league. And we play The Patriots in the FTWL in Week 2 too.  That's not ironic, but it sure is funny how that worked out.

1 comment:

LOBO said...

Chris rides my keyster for autodrafting, but I rank autodrafts carefully and generally end up with the fundamentals for a solid team.

Sissy [Patriots] didn't rank or adjust her lineup, and got a fairly impressive victory.

I get what Chris is saying, but I like the adventure of a new team every year: new strengths, new weaknesses. And RF and I both love the waiver wire prospect prowl ... it is half of the fun of playing!