Thursday, September 27, 2012

Purple Drank Serving Notice

So, I've given you all a few weeks to talk your talk, puff your chests, and pretend you are contenders.

Now I'm back to reclaim my place as contender and biggest crap-talker.

I'm not the defending champion Lobo, who is being outscored overall but somehow sits at 2-1.

I'm not the 3-0 Unfinished Person, who finds out the HBFFL results via his cutting edge communication technology.

I'm not one of those Canadian guys fighting over twittens to keep my hands warm enough to make a lineup change.

I'm the Purple Drank bitches.

(In case you have forgotten.)

All that said the economy has been a bear this year and Purple Drank had to make some cuts in the budget for secret weapons. Life was much easier back in 2009 when I could blow a billion on Superman and the Death Star/Darth Vader combo. (I did get a nice deal on that combo so there's that.)

Today not so much, so I was forced to curtail secret weapon usage until Week Four. And the timing could not be better since I face "Mister I Get My Game Updates From Smoke Signals" Unfinished Person and his previously mentioned 3-0 squad.

I'm busting out one of my top secret weapons, and one that won't break the bank...cause he's unemployed and looking for work....

Yup, Taylor from Terra Nova. He pwned a dinosaur like 20 times his size with that knife and torch. He's like a BC Chuck Norris and I've brought him back from the past to annihilate UP's team.

What does that mean for Unfinished Person?

Bad news!

4 comments:

LOBO said...

Just because you get a pic of Congress and slap a "What u know?" caption on it doesn't elevate your product to the level of other refreshing juggernauts like Fanta, Faygo, and various lead based Sherwin-Williams sealers and top coats.

Go ahead and serve notice.

-Just don't serve Purple Drank.

nonamedufus said...

I wondered where the hell Taylor went.

Chris C said...

@Lobo: I think the woman in the pic was Michelle Bauchman but I can't be sure.

@noname: Now you know.

@James: You need to show us how much your members love us before we can commit. You've got a heck of a community built up btw, one we are envious of for obvious reasons. We await your response with bated breath.

Unfinished Person said...

Arian Foster farts in your general direction! And when he farts, you better be afraid, very afraid.