Detroit Rock City? Not anymore...

On Thanksgiving, at half-time of the Detroit Lions-Green Bay Packers game, this abomination of a group (and to boot, they're Canadian! get the fuck out of here, eh?) will perform:

photo courtesy of Daniel F. Pigatto on Flickr

At least, one Michigan resident said, "Hell to the NO!" (rumored to be the name of Nickelback's next big album because if anything, they're known for their ways of picking up on cliches and turning them into shit that sells) and put up an online petition that garnered more than 50,000 votes. However, the Lions still are allowing these Canadian posers to play.

And it's not as if Detroit doesn't have some of its own musicians that kick ass (actual ass and not lame ass as with Chad and the crew): Ted "The Motor City Madman" Nugent , Alice Cooper, The White Stripes, Kid Rock -- even Eminem, who at least grew up there, for Dr. Dre's sake.

My vote is for Alice Cooper because even when he's visiting another city, he knows its history:

Can you imagine Chad lecturing anyone on...I don't know...anything?

Plus the Detroit dude could write some trenchant lyrics like this:

Enough said.

Fans of Bad Teams Use Yahoo Search

"One is an accident, two is a coincidence, three is a trend."

I have no idea where that saying came from, or who said it but we are clearly at the coincidence stage when it comes to Yahoo Trends on Sundays and crappy football teams.

Last Sunday the Lions/Bears game was in the top-ten of Yahoo's Trends list:

Ironically enough, that game featured the infamous Calvin Johnson non-touchdown reception. You know, the one that was ruled an incomplete pass because he did not hold onto the ball for ten minutes. And there was a lack of a "second act", whatever the hell that means.

Has the NFL suddenly gone Shakespeare?

 True to form for 2010, another crappy game ended up in the top-ten of the Yahoo Trends list yesterday:

Rams vs. the Raiders? Really?

And like last week, there was a reality check when you looked into the trend results...

The hundreds of people that are Raiders fans did not get to see their team win the game. They also did not see Jason Campbell get benched. Or see Darren McFadden rush for 145 yards.

Still, despite that bittersweet outcome, we are just one week away from establishing a trend.

Okay, we aren't. The fans of crappy teams are.

Now if you will excuse me, I need to watch for next week's bad game trend.

I also need to make a waiver claim for the Asian Unicorn. My team needs all the luck it can get.

2009 NFL Offseason Report

The 2009 Fantasy Football season is nearly upon us already and the HBFFL will be back in action soon. What better way to kick off the 2009 campaign then with a look back at one crazy NFL off-season.

Michael Vick Buys a Dog

Now that Vick is out of jail, he will need a good training partner to help him get ready for his return to the NFL and hopefully relevancy in fantasy football. Since he has experience with dogs the decision was a no-brainer.

As you can see by the picture above, taken during a recent workout, Vick made the perfect choice. It is a bit of wishful thinking though wearing the Falcons uniform. I don't think they will sign him.

There is no truth to the rumor he used the alias "Ron Mexico" to purchase the dog however.

Detroit Tries out Midget Cheerleaders to Boost Fan Interest, Cute Factor

When a team is coming off an 0-16 season it is a good idea to try any stunt or gimmick to put fans in the seats, especially when they play in Detroit.



Hoping to boost ticket sales the Lions' front office announced they would be trying out little people for the cheerleading squad during training camp.

A current player, who wished to remain anonymous because he was speaking off the record said: "Every time I see one I just want to pick them up and hug them. They are just that cute."

Lessons Learned: The McNair Effect

Never pass out in the same house as your crazy girlfriend, especially when she has access to weapons. Did anyone not learn from the John Wayne Bobbitt experience?

None the less, the death of Steve McNair did not affect fantasy football but it did send a lot of NFL players scrambling to renew their wedding vows recently.

Brett Favre Looks to QB High School Team

Quarterback Brett Favre signed a non-binding agreement recently to line up under center for the Oak Grove High football team in Mississippi.

Head Coach Bubba Franklin was excited about his team's chances: "With Brett on our team we could easily win the state championship and lead the league in interceptions thrown at the same time. Few high school teams can brag about doing that."